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Part 9 of 12 / Building A Real & Honest Relationship With God

  • Writer: Chris Houser
    Chris Houser
  • 12 hours ago
  • 7 min read

Introduction


Prayer is often one of the most talked about parts of living the Christian Life; however, it is one of the most quietly misunderstood in ones walk. You may know how you are supposed to pray and you might even try to pray the way you were taught. But deep down in your spirit, you might be wrestling with questions like:


  1. "Am I Saying The Right Things?"

  2. "Why Does This Feel So Hard sometimes?"

  3. "Is God Really Listening?"

  4. Why Do I Not Feel Anything When I Pray?"


Did you know that prayer is one of the easiest areas that we as new believers can overthink or avoid altogether when it feels unfamiliar or inconsistent? At prayers core, it is NOT about getting the words right, but about being REAL with God.


Prayer is NOT about performance or a script. It is about an HONEST Relationship with Jesus!


Prayer is Personal, Honest, & Ongoing Personal Transformation.


Prayer Is About Relationship - Not A Ritual


One of the biggest shifts you can make as a new believer is that you see that prayer is NOT something you do to check off a daily box, but that you see it is how you personally connect with God.


  • "But you, when you pray, go into your room . . . and pray to your Father who is in the secret place . . ." - Matthew 6:6


Notice Jesus' words and how personal He makes this for those He is teaching. He is not asking you or I for performance, but He is inviting you into a private, personal, and real conversation with Him about what is on your heart.


When we go and pray, sometimes we feel that we need:


  1. Perfect Words

  2. Formal Language

  3. A Certain Tone


What if I told you that it is very easy to talk to your Father in Heaven HONESTLY?


  1. Your Fears

  2. Your Doubts

  3. Your Struggles

  4. Your Desires

  5. Your Everyday Thoughts


Doesn't sound so hard does it? Remember, nothing is too small for God and nothing is too messy. Your Father in Heaven is NOT looking for polished prayers, no, He is looking for your HEART.


God Is Listening Even In The Stillness Of No Response


In society in our world, we are instant gratification. We are yes individuals. We want immediate results. Did you know that believers also treat God the same way when we pray? The reason that this happens is that when believers pray, we want an instant answer, but 9 out of 10 times, there is silence.


You may pray and feel like:


  1. Nothing Is Happening

  2. There Is No Response

  3. Your Words Are Just Floating


What if your feelings are NOT always an accurate measure of what true real prayer is?


  • "This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us." - 1 John 5:14


Let me make this clear: God HEARS You!


NOT sometimes, NOT when you feel spiritual enough, but EVERY SINGLE TIME!


When you hear quiet, God is still NOT absent before you, He is there! He is PRESENT!


When we pray, we usually want instant answers as stated earlier, but it is NOT about immediate!


It is about an ONGOING CONNECTION to the Father which is BUILDING TRUST.


Prayer Is Honest - Not Filtered


Many people unknowingly filter their prayers. What does this mean? It means that they only pray based on what "sounds right" instead of what is real and authentic. But God already knows your thoughts. All He is asking is that you are Honest with Him.


  • "Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour out your hearts before Him; God is a refuge for us." - Psalm 62:8


The word "pour out", it means holding nothing back.


You can say:


  1. "God, I'm Struggling Right Now."

  2. "I Don't Understand What You're Doing."

  3. "I Feel Very Distant From You."

  4. "I Need Help."


Being this honest does NOT push you away from God, but it draws you closer to Him. When you go to God in prayer in honesty, real prayer begins where pretending now ends.


Jesus Gave A Simple Model For Prayer


If you've ever felt unsure how to pray, Jesus gave us a very simple framework. No, it is NOT a script to repeat mechanically as some religious churches do, but it is a guide to follow.


  • “Pray, then, in this way: ‘Our Father, who is in heaven, Hallowed be Your name. ‘ Your kingdom come. Your will be done, On earth as it is in heaven. ‘Give us this day our daily bread. ‘And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. ‘And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil.’" - Matthew 6:9-13


Here is how you can break this Scripture Passage down:


  1. "Our Father In Heaven . . ." | Starts With Relationship

  2. "Your Kingdom Come . . ." | Surrender To God's Will

  3. "Give Us This Day . . ." | Bring Your Needs To Him

  4. "Forgive Us . . ." | Confess & Receive His Grace

  5. "Lead Us Not Into Temptation . . ." | Ask Him For Guidance & Strength


This shows how prayer life is balanced:


  1. Personal & Surrendered

  2. Honest & Dependent

  3. Relational & Trusting


Prayer Is Ongoing - Not Occasional


Prayer is NOT meant to be limited to one moment in your day; it is to become a daily lifestyle.


  • "Pray without ceasing." - 1 Thessalonians 5:17


What this passage does NOT mean is you are to constantly be speaking words. It means that you are to live with an ongoing awareness of God in your personal life and growth in His Son Jesus.


When you begin to talk to Him:


  1. Talk To Him Throughout Your Day

  2. Bring Small Decisions To Him

  3. Acknowledge Him In Ordinary Moments


As you being to practice your life of prayer towards Him, prayer becomes less like an event and more like a continuous deep conversation with the Father in Heaven who loves you unconditionally.


When You Do Not Have The Words For Speaking


There are times when believers go before God and they don't have words. It could be because:


  1. You Feel Overwhelmed

  2. You Feel Numb

  3. You Don't Know How To Express What's Inside


When this happens, remember, this is okay and God is not upset with you. You are NOT alone.


  • "Now in the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know what to pray for as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God." - Romans 8:26-27


Did you catch that when reading the passage? The Holy Spirit helps you pray, even when you don't have the words. Sometimes prayer is simply this:


  1. Sitting Quietly Before God

  2. Saying A Few Honest Words

  3. Letting Your Heart Be Known Without Explaining Everything


How is this right? It is because God understands what we cannot express because its heavy.


Prayer Changes You


While prayer does involve bringing requests to God the Father, one of its greatest effects is internal. Prayer does something to us as individuals because of how simple, yet powerful it is.


Prayer Changes:


  1. Your Persepctive

  2. Your Peace

  3. Your Trust


  • "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and pleading with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4:6-7


Sometimes the situation doesn't change immediately. Do NOT expect it to each time you pray otherwise you'll always be disappointed. But something inside of you changes when you do pray.


You Leave Prayer Feeling:


  1. More Grounded

  2. More Aware Of God

  3. More At Peace


This is NOT small, but it is TRANSFORMATION!


Conclusion


Prayer is NOT about doing it perfectly, saying the right things, or hoping for instant results. It is about showing up being honest, being consistent, and being very openly personal towards God. When you are praying you are bringing your real self, you are connecting with a real God who loves you, and you are trusting growth in the realtionship He is building with you.


You do NOT have to strive or perform for praying to your Father in Heaven. All you have to do is come openly before Him. When you do this every time, God is always there. He is always saying, "I'm listening, I care about you, and I desire to be present in this moment with you."


Application


This week, begin building a simple, consistent rhythm:


  • Set Aside 10-15 Minutes Daily For Focused Prayer With Your Father

  • Talk To God Honestly - No Filtering

  • Throughout Your Day, Include God In Small Moments

  • Do Not Try To Think Of The Right Words, Just Talk To Him, He Is Listening


Practice this prayer: "Father, help me to be real with You. Teach me to talk with You, not just at set times, but throughout my day."


Reflection Questions


  1. How have I viewed prayer as I've grown up? Has it been through obligation or authentic relationship with God?

  2. What holds me back from being fully honest with God?

  3. Do I believe God is truly listening when I pray?

  4. What would it look like if I included God more in my daily life and personal growth with Him?


Closing Prayer


Father, thank You that I am able to come to You freely without conditions. Help me to let go of fear, pressure, and performance in praying to You. Teach me to be honest, to be constant, and to grow in realtionship with You. Remind me that You are always listening, always present, and always near. Let prayer become something I look forward to, not just something I feel pressured to do.


We ask this in Jesus' Name, Amen.


Week 10 Preview


"Obedience: Walking Out Your Faith In Everyday Life"


Next week, we will go deeper into what it means to live out your Faith as a Christ-like example. You'll learn about:


  • Why Obedience Matters

  • How To Follow God Even When It Is Difficult

  • What It Looks Like To Live Your Faith Daily


In Week 10, you'll begin to see that obedience is NOT about rules or regulations based on what others push you to do, but it is about trusting, loving, and being in aligntment with God's heart, NOT mans or religious obligations.

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